Tag Archives: love

The One Question You Don’t Want to Ask Yourself in Heaven.

I’m a huge Marvel fan. I’ve seen most of the Marvel movies and shows. Recently, Marvel released a new show called “What If?” The show examines what would happen if the usual storylines we’re familiar with in the Marvel movies took different turns. Like what if Peggy Carter became Captain America instead of Steve Rogers? Or what if Starlord was T’challa instead of Peter Quill? “What if” is a big question. It explores the realm of possibility. This is one question you don’t want to ask yourself when we get to eternity. Why, you might ask? Let’s explore this.

God’s Perfect Plan for You

The Bible says God has a perfect plan for our lives. But He does give us free will. We can choose to do things our way, outside of God’s will. Just look at Adam and Eve. God’s perfect will for them was to stay in the Garden of Eden: where they lived in peace, and had all the food and fulfillment they needed. But they chose to live outside of God’s plan for them. This plan was not as good as God’s plan: filled with toil, pain, sweat, and hurt. I often wondered what would have happened if Adam did not eat the fruit. If Adam chose to allow God to lead his life and not himself.

If we allow God to lead our lives, we won’t ever have to question what if. Because we will be in God’s perfect will. Now we are human, all of us struggle with doubt, or fear. But this is an appeal to live a life of faith. If you feel the Lord leading you to write a book-write the book. Or if you hear Him tell you to start a hard conversation with a family member about their faith, start that conversation. If you’re feeling afraid, do it with fear. God will see you through! But you probably should do it because you never know what is on the other side of your obedience. And if you stumble in your obedience, repent and keep going. God doesn’t give up on us if we struggle with our faith.

Use Your Gifts to Worship God

Live your best life for God! Use every gift and talent the Lord has given you. He gave it to you, so use it! Are you gifted in painting? Sell paintings or teach a class. Can you play piano? Play at church or in a band. Be like the man in the Bible who used all the talents the Lord gave him and brought a return on them. And if you aren’t sure what your gifts are, pray for guidance, do some online personality tests and some self-exploration. Check out the personality tests below:

https://www.16personalities.com

https://www.focusonthefamily.com/bring-your-bible/personality-test/

“He also that had received two talents came and said, Lord, thou deliveredst unto me two talents: behold, I have gained two other talents beside them.”

“His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord…Lord (wicked servant speaking), I knew thee that thou art an hard man, reaping where thou hast not sown…And I was afraid, and went and hid thy talent in the earth: lo, there thou hast that is thine.”

“His lord answered and said unto him, Thou wicked and slothful servant, thou knewest that I reap where I sowed not, and gather where I have not strawed…And cast ye the unprofitable servant into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” (Matthew 25:14-30).

Don’t hide your talents out of fear. Do you know why the Lord was angry at the servant for hiding his talents? Because God gives us gifts to be used. Our gifts aren’t given to serve ourselves, but they’re given to be used as a form of worship in service. Just as Christ came not to be served but to serve others (Matthew 20:28).

Live Your Best Life for God

I don’t know if you can feel it but I feel we are in the last days. It’s like a feeling in me confirmed by what I see in the world every day. Jesus says in the last days there would be wars and rumors of wars (Matthew 24:6). Just take a look at the news and you can see this is a fact. Right now, commentators are speculating the US and China could go to war in the South Pacific. Daniel 9:27 says the antichrist would establish himself as god in the third temple in Jerusalem. There hasn’t been a temple or sacrificial system in Israel for many years but Israeli leaders have already started planning for the building of the third temple.

Why am I telling you all this? Because I don’t want you to have any regrets. Now more than ever, Christians need to be who God called us to be: ALL of what God called us to be. We are called to be bold as lions (Proverbs 28:1), have strong confidence (Proverbs 14:26), to preach the truth to all who will listen (Matthew 28:16-20), to work hard (Colossians 3:23), and to love God and others (Mark 12:31). We should live hard for God everyday. Compared to our lives on Earth, Eternity is a long time. I personally don’t want to spend that time asking myself what if: What if I had prayed more? What if I had fasted more? What if I had loved more? Because by then, it will be too late.

Monday Musings: For Those Who Hate Being Single

Everyone has had that horrible feeling of scrolling through social media or walking down the street seeing a cute couple and thinking to yourself-I want that!

Everyone wants relationship goals: A hot guy or girl on your arm and a ring on your finger. I can relate. Before I got married, I hated being single. There were many nights I spent sadly scrolling through instagram looking at all the beautiful couples. But eventually, I was able to see the many perks of being single. And trust me, there are some perks! While marriage is awesome and I wouldn’t trade my husband for the world, I have to admit being single has a lot of perks.

1. You Have All the Time in the World

Folks who are single have boundless time compared to married people. Don’t get me wrong of course we all work, or go to school and other responsibilities. But being unmarried gives you the liberty to decide what you want to do with your time without consulting your spouse. So you can choose to go study abroad in France for a semester. Or go on a missions trip to Africa. You also have the freedom to explore your own desires and figure out what you want to do with your life. In retrospect, I wish I had travelled more when I was single. I had more free time, and time is a precious commodity. With free time, comes less responsibility.

2. Less Responsibility

Being single means you have a lot less responsibility compared to married people. Sure you may have bills, or take care of family members and such. But having a spouse comes with a whole host of other responsibilities. Since you’re joined to another person, you’re also joined to their responsibilities as well. When you’re married, you have to ensure that you and your spouse are fed, housed, bills are paid, appointments kept, and so on and so forth. Single people have (generally) less responsibility and gives you again, more time to yourself to do what you want to do. You can hang out with your friends as much as you want. You’re also more in charge of your money. You don’t have to consult with your spouse before making a huge purchase. So if your single and have the means, buy the Louis Vuitton shoes now lol.

3. Grow Closer to God

Finally, and most importantly, being single means you have more time to spend with God. Take a day to fast and spend time with the Lord—sure, why not? Spend the rest of the night studying Levitical priesthood? Heck yes! Plan a trip to Israel next year? Hello! When I was single, I spent sooo much more time with God compared to when I was married. The Apostle Paul even says about single Christian women that they desire to serve God more compared to married Christian women,

“There is a difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit; but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.” (1 Corinthians 7:34).

When I was single, my desire was definitely to love on God as much as I could. God and I had movie nights, I would spend evenings fasting and praying; and I grew in my faith by leaps and bounds. This isn’t to say that you can’t continue to do these things in marriage, but its different. You have to consider what your husband might need or what you both have planned for the day, or what you need to do around the house. If I want to have a movie night with God, I’ll have to plan it out now. Growing in my faith takes a little more planning now that I’m married. Generally, EVERYTHING takes a lot more planning when you’re married compared to when you’re single.

I know how hard being single can be: you really, really want someone you can spend life with and love on. But Ecclesiastes 3:1 states, “for everything there is a time and a season.” If we put so much stock into getting married, and think our lives won’t begin until marriage; not only will you be wasting time to do the things God wants you to do NOW but you probably won’t get married because you’ve created an idol out of marriage. In Exodus 20:3 God says, “You will have no other gods before me.” God will withhold things from us if were creating gods out of them.

Trust me, I’ve been there so I get it. But when I stopped being hellbent on not being single-my life blossomed! I grew in my relationship with God, grew to love myself and know who I am in Christ, and volunteered a lot. And I got married once I stopped focusing so much on being married. You can do the same. If you have a desire to be married, I believe God gave you that desire. Psalm 37:4 says to “delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

Notice what this promise says first-to delight yourself in the Lord FIRST. Then He will give you what you want.

For example, if you desire to preach the gospel to millions of people, its safe to say God placed that desire in your heart because He wants you to do that someday. And God will give you that desire: if you desire to preach the gospel to millions of people, He will make that happen. It’s the same with marriage. If you desire to be married, God will allow you to get married. But don’t let it be the end all be all. God should be our ultimate desire. When we have Him, we have everything.

How I Knew My Husband was the “One.”

In today’s day and age, there are so many ways to meet people: social media, online groups, dating apps or sites. How do we find “the one?” Well for me, God told me when and how I would meet my husband.

What??

I know, it sounds wild, but its true! In fact, God gave me multiple confirmations that Jason was the one for me. With all the methods available to us today its so important to be led by God as to who “the One” is. In this article, I’ll give you three ways God can show you who is “the One.”

Three ways to Know He/She is “The One”

1. The When and How

When I was single, I spent a lot of time in prayer, and bible study. This allowed me to grow in my relationship with God. I felt lead to pray for my future husband. He told me in November 2019 that I would meet my spouse the following January 2020, we would meet on Facebook and we would get married fast. I wrote this down in my journal and just knew it was a fact. I knew I would meet my husband the following January. Thanksgiving 2019, it felt like it would be the last thanksgiving I would have with my family in a while. I knew I would be moving from Maryland the following year and getting married. And I had so much peace with that.

2. Peace

When Jason and I got engaged, some people did not approve of our marriage. Rightfully so, we had only met in January and were getting engaged in June. I understood their hesitation, and even fear. But with Jason, we clicked on so many things like our desire to have children, our desire to live in Florida, we both shared the same Christian faith, and we both had similar financial goals. There were no red flags either. He is a genuine, kind, intelligent, hardworking man with a vision and goals for himself that I wanted to be apart of. He was my best friend, and I loved being with him. He pushed me to be better. I was confident he would take care of me, and our future children. I knew without a shadow of doubt he would never harm me. In spite of all the chaos in the world, as long as I was able to be with him, I would be okay.

3. Opposition

I knew my husband was the one because we had some chaos during our engagement. Don’t get me wrong, God works in decency and in order. Satan will often attack you before you reach your promised blessing. Look at the people of Israel, as they travelled to the promised land, the surrounding nations gathered together to fight against God’s people (Joshua 11:5). The people of Israel had to depend on the Lord to get through this. God is a god of love but he is also a god of war. He will fight for His people if you trust him. I had multiple instances of opposition from people in my life. Of course it sucked, but because I knew what God told me I used that opposition as further confirmation that Jason was the one. Although there will be opposition, you will still have peace knowing your spouse is “the one.”

Declaring the end from the beginning, and from ancient times the things that are not yet done, saying, My counsel shall stand, and I will do all my pleasure,” Isaiah 46:10

God knows our end from our beginning. Like every area of your life, its so important to be led by God in your love life.

While God gives us free will, he also has a perfect will for our lives. I wanted God’s perfect will for me, so I invited him into my love life and had him lead me to my spouse. God surely can tell you when you’ll meet your spouse like He did for me, or even who He is. But He can show you in other ways too: if you meet a guy who’s mature, loves the Lord, respects you, works hard, and has goals for himself and his future you can get with then you’ll know he is the one. But if you see multiple red flags, don’t feel respected by him, he isn’t mature, you disagree on key things like family planning, children, financial or career goals, or family issues then maybe its a sign to take a step back. God is the ultimate matchmaker. Allow him to write your love story. I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Four Ways to Have Intimacy With Your Significant Other Without “Getting Intimate”

Let’s be real. As unmarried Christians in relationships, we may want to have intimacy with our boyfriends or girlfriends. Hey, we’re only human! Of course everyone will say, “don’t have sex!” Or “just don’t do it! Wait until marriage.” Or “just keep waiting.” But sometimes you may feel like you can’t wait. Or you may have such strong feelings for your significant other you feel you just can’t wait! You may feel the only way you can have intimacy with your significant other is only through sex. But can you have intimacy without getting it on? Why yes you can!

Intimacy ideas

1. Learn Each Other’s Love Language

Knowing your partner’s love language help you know just how to love on your spouse. Because love isn’t just about saying “I love you.” Like faith, love without action is dead. You’ll have to pair your expressions of love with actions. Some people need love by words of affirmation. Some people need love through acts of service. Others need love by quality time. Others require affection (but be careful with this one, haha). Take the love language test below to determine what your partner’s love language is and work on appeasing to that whenever you can.

https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/love-language

2. Find Activities to do Together

Work on a new skill or project together: take a language class, or learn to dance! Jason and I would workout together when we were dating. This not only helped us connect, but it was great to see results from something we’ve worked on together. We also read books together, which gave us good things to talk about. Find ways to grow together.

3. Pray or Fast Together

Let me tell you: praying together helped so much in our relationship. Bringing God in is always great but really praying and even studying the Bible together and fasting can help your intimacy get stronger because you’re bonding over your shared love and need for God. And be real when you pray! If you’re feeling tempted to get intimate, tell God! He will always help you.

4. Remember the End Goal and Work to Have a Great Future Marriage

When Jason and I were dating, we made sure to do our homework because we had an end goal in mind: a great marriage. We listened to a lot of marriage podcasts. There are a few wonderful podcasts we would listen to together called “The Godly Dating Podcast” and “Dear Young Married Couple” while we were dating. These podcasts were great! They always provoked deep, thought-provoking conversations. Dear Young Married Couple actually has decks of cards that feature questions you can ask each other while you’re dating and during marriage! We got a deck, and have really enjoyed them! Sometimes you want to know what your spouse thinks about key issues like children or finances but don’t know where to start. So these card decks really help with starting those conversations. See links below!

*Not Sponsored*

This deck is for those in relationships that are still on the journey of growing in their relationship. Lots of great questions to ask each other.

This deck is for deeper conversations that really stimulate thought-provoking conversations any boyfriend or girlfriend should ask each other before marriage.

In Luke 17:1, Jesus tells his disciples “There will always be temptations to sin.” We have to be prepared for the temptation. Be real, when you’re with a person you sincerely love, and are attracted to-the temptation is bound to come! So, its important to be prepared by finding other ways to have intimacy without getting intimate.